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Leigh Amiot's avatar

Yet another time I had to stifle laughter in the wee hours so that I don’t wake my husband: Jacques Strap, Ollie Tabooger…🤣

On deck in my pantry, thanks to Publix’s BOGO sales, are four jars of good old-fashioned Duke’s Mayonnaise. It goes on sandwiches, in squash casserole, chicken salad, homemade tartar sauce…

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Debbie Taylor's avatar

I hear Angels sing when I see a Duke’s BOGO sale at Publix!

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Leigh Amiot's avatar

🤣

Yes!

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Paul McCutchen's avatar

Used your quote in my story. Hope you didn't mind

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Leigh Amiot's avatar

Not one bit.

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Dalton Sullivan's avatar

Sean, long-time reader from Tuscumbia, Ala. I live in a split household. It's kind of like Alabama-Auburn. I am a Duke's mayonnaise lover. My wife, bless her heart, prefers Hellman's. Frequently you see jars of both taking up precious space in the fridge..

As my dad would tell me, pick your battles. As wrong as she is, my wife is not going to change her mind, so we have learned to coexist as a two-mayonnaise family.

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Te Burt's avatar

The response reminds me of the most discussed and argued-about issue on another website: which way do you put TP on the TP holder (And that's "toilet paper" to those too, uh, busy to work out what TP is.) Longest running argument I've ever seen that got downright nasty! I solved the dilemma by recommending installing the TP holder in a vertical position, thereby frustrating every cat in America ( although no cat is going to admit it!). I was labeled a subversive traitor! So expect to receive reminders of your "worst idea" (testing mayonnaise, for God's sake -- couldn't you have picked something that really matters, like chocolate!!) for the rest of your life. (And since you aren't native to AL, you wouldn't know that Huntsville is considered a foreign country and not part of the state.)

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Karri Misky's avatar

If you Google the patent for toilet paper, you will find that it's “Over”. I remember the toilet paper campaign. I thought it was brilliant advertising.

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Rosy Otto's avatar

I realized it was ‘over’ when I examined closely a roll with flower pattern. Then it became obvious.

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Debbie Taylor's avatar

My husband just doesn’t get it … I have to flip the roll EVERY time he puts one on the dang holder with the end hiding underneath.

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Patricia Dianne Gibson's avatar

That is funny 😂

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Marie's avatar

Duke’s wins again!❤️😂😍👏🏻🥳💯🥇

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Karen's avatar

If I had to taste 73 mayos, I could never eat it again. Thank you for your sacrifice. You deserve an award for sure.

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Tom McCoppin's avatar

Hi Sean. I was gratified to learn that Duke's contains no sugar, since I am a sugar addict and admire and appreciate products that achieve good taste without using sugar. In the process of double checking your Duke's sugar claims, I was afforded the opportunity to sign up for the "Duke's Twang Talk Newsletter". Life is good! (Especially when I begin my day by reading your words!) Tom McCoppin, The Goat Ranch Formerly Known as Lake McQueeney, Texas.

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Steve's avatar

Great that my wife was right again for Dukes being number 1!

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Joann Thompson's avatar

It's always great to hear a man say is wife is right! :)

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Becky Moon's avatar

Dukes all the way.

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Anne Byrn's avatar

Sean, you are a brave soul! Next, take on cornbread and see if people are opinionated! Agree about Dukes. I was raised on Hellmans, but I have converted because Dukes tastes similar to homemade mayo and even more so if you drizzle in a little olive oil and sprinkle it with paprika!

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Leigh Amiot's avatar

I’m starstruck!

Love your honey bun cake, and your orange chocolate cake was one of my (now grown) son’s favorites, made it for his birthday a number of times.

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Anne Byrn's avatar

Ah, the honey bun cake! So happy my recipes have been a part of your life!

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ricpayson@yahoo.com's avatar

Hilarious Sean. The mayo wars.

Who woulda thunk. Are ya gonna do ketchup next? Now thats journalism.

Peace

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MB's avatar

One has to choose what battles to fight in marriage. While I respect, Sean, that your battle is Duke’s v Everything Else Mayonnaise, mine is the bigger war of Mayo v Miracle Whip. My husband grew up on the latter and insists on keeping some in the fridge. His mother never knew there was a difference(!!!). (Or that margarine wasn’t real butter, which is its own story.) Hubs and I have settled into a detente, which is that he has his and I have mine. When I make anything that calls for mayonnaise, I use it and pay up for Hellman’s (“It’s worth paying more for Hellman’s than less for any other brand,” said my grandmother.) After 22 years of marriage, I’m noticing cracks in his armor: he consents every now and then to Mayo on his sandwich. I do my victory dance in private.

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Bruce C's avatar

Sounds like our house, MB, only it’s been over the course of 35 plus years for us. All we had was Miracle Whip when I was growing up (I strongly resented Sean saying it was neither a miracle nor a whip in his previous column), but now I am finally accepting that Hellman’s (pretty sure that’s what my wife grew up with) is an acceptable alternative to MW ... kinda, sorta, once in a while.

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Lucy Dunford's avatar

You obviously do not recognize the hornet’s nest you continue to stir. My whole life I have recognized that I have an entrenched prejudice for Hellman’s Original Mayonnaise. But being the magnanimous person I am, I buy Duke’s when my North Carolina son and family visit me in Kentucky. But this column still does not clearly and succinctly state that you tried this particular brand over a long list of Hellman’s pretend Mayo. You need to state categorically that you tried Hellman’s Original and what actual score it received. And you gave as an excuse that It had sugar in the ingredients which you would not have known in the taste test. Everyone knows if you have a drop of Southern blood you put sugar in your Mayo and your cornbread and your tomato sauce. Your prejudice has shown that this was a flawed survey and calls for the immediate action of a more tightly regulated study with more discerning judges with exceptional palates. And the entire results of the study need to be released to the public.

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Pubert Earle Bozemann's avatar

Lucy, let's don't whoop Pone's ass. BTW, HOW big a Ole boy is he?!

Pubert

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Susie S's avatar

Lol, Lucy!! 😂😂

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Patricia's avatar

Definitely Dukes in this house!!

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Joy Jacobs's avatar

At my age (71) my taste buds are not as discriminating as they once might have been. My mother always bought what ever was the cheapest so I just buy and enjoy whatever Mayonnaise Aldi’s has. 😏😏

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Leigh Amiot's avatar

Joy, an Aldi is finally coming to Valdosta, Georgia, not sure when it will open, but I plan to be a patron. Shopped at one in St. Augustine, Florida while on a camping trip and was impressed.

Your comment reminded me of growing up in a three generation household of 7 total, no designer mayonnaise there, but as in your mother’s home, what was on sale.

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Joy Jacobs's avatar

I’ve been shopping at Aldi since 1980ish. I’ve seen a lot of changes, all good.

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NanJ's avatar

In the late 80s my husband’s job moved us from The South to, yikes, Chicagoland. What a life shock! I had to get used to a lot but realizing there was no Duke’s was earth shattering. I tried all the different brands but none, absolutely none, came close to Duke’s. Family members would bring us a jar or two when they visited. When my niece moved to California her mother would send her a boxes of Duke’s occasionally. Well, until one box was ruined because it must have been subjected to cold weather and froze - jars of separated, and ruined, mayo. Not realizing you can’t mail an emulsion during the winter - a Southern thing!

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Dolores's avatar

How about made from scratch mayonnaise? Jaime would whip up a delicious batch I’m betting. I’m still waiting on the cookbook.

At Thanksgiving Mom always slathered her turkeys with mayonnaise before the salt and pepper. She always stuffed her birds too (gasp). I think that aided in moist and delicious meat. Mom’s thanksgivings were epic, everything perfection.

Last summer I was adopted by a black cat with a white patch on his lower belly. I wanted to name him Jacques as in Jacques Strap but the grandsons won out with ‘Kong’.

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Paul McCutchen's avatar

My wife has a number of Church cookbooks from around the area. Usually, you can find a lot of condiment scratch recipes.

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