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Paul McCutchen's avatar

I got on a flight from Atlanta to Memphis, back when it didn't take as long to get to the airport as driving does, and the pilot told us the same thing. In about thirty minutes, it was fixed but we were running late and apparently that knocks schedules out of whack in the space time continuum. They closed the door then the pilot come over the intercom: "we are running late so it is going to be a little loud going to Memphis. I am going to fly it like we are stealing it." We got to Memphis almost on time. Kinda like we were running from the Air Police.

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Pam Mcnutt's avatar

Ok, I am going to be brutally honest, this was the funniest moment I had all day! I laughed out loud and then laughed some more…thanks for that! I've never flown in a plane, I never will. The way I figure it is, I should have done it years ago when airplanes were new, and worked properly. Meh, no big deal.💕

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Julie RN's avatar

I’d much rather drive than fly. Too many headaches in the airport and in the air. Besides, on the open road, my Vette makes very good time. I won’t admit to ever going top speed at 187 mph…how do I know that? Only that it wasn’t me behind the wheel ‼️🏎️‼️

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Bruce Hartnett's avatar

My memory goes back to the 60s & 70s of just over 140 in a 56 Mercury on a two lane Hwy (more than once), then the same on a friend's 750 Honda on a hilly paved road, while in the Navy.

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Julie RN's avatar

Uh-oh…was that Honda perchance a motorcycle?

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Julie RN's avatar

I thought so! And glad you lived to tell the story!

Now if I may “Thank You for Your Service” in the United States Navy…God Bless You, Bruce ✝️

All Gave Some, and Some Gave All ❤️🇺🇸💙

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Paul McCutchen's avatar

When I first moved to Georgia My wife would take me to the airport and would pick me up on my return. Now it is easier to go to the parking lots and let them get you back and forth, but it is just a few more hours to drive.

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Patricia Dianne Gibson's avatar

You just described extremely well why I do not fly😂😂

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Josie's avatar

My dear sweet friend I love these comedic stories thank you for another day of laughter and chuckles 🤭 stay blessed 🙏

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Lori C.'s avatar

I never knew I could laugh this hard at 5 am. Doesn’t what you described happen on just about every flight? I recently had one of the most horrible flights of my life. Hubby flies a ton for work and confirmed it was his worst. When I say that plane fell out of the sky, we bounced like a roller coaster for 40 minutes and several times, dropped straight down what felt like an eternity. The lady behind me was praying the rosary the whole time. If I hadn’t been wearing my seatbelt I would have a concussion. It’s going to be awhile before I get the courage again!

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Rose Maly, MD, MSPH's avatar

5am your time, 2am mine, you eastern elite, you! ;)

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Cheryl Chastain's avatar

Rough roads in the sky!

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Ellie G's avatar

My last flight was September 2009 on my honeymoon. Never gonna fly again. It is an ugly experience. I like a good road trip. We had a short one last weekend and we saw many interesting and even funny things.

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Cheryl Chastain's avatar

My last flight was during the first week of September 2001.

A different time altogether.

I do like to fly; if I could, I would open the window and ride with my head out.

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Lknotts's avatar

Wow, something similar happened to the people waiting at the gate next to mine. After a delay that increased incrementally until it reached several hours, their flight was cancelled. Mine was only delayed by an hour and a half. When folks asked how my flight was, I said, "GREAT!"

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ricpayson@yahoo.com's avatar

A gracious good morning and happy Saturday to all yall. He'll Sean, if I had your money, I'd be flying in a biz jet ! Which by the way if you ever get a chance try it. For the last several years I have flown a Chevy. There aren't many bad smells and when I snore, I wake right up. Speaking of bad smells, a CSI guy told me to put a little dab of Vicks Vaporub inside your mask. It works great.

Anyway the canine crew and I are heading to da barn . Yall have a splendiferous day and...

Peace

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MAM's avatar

Flying used to be an adventure; nowadays it's a full-blown torture! I made the observation back in the 1980s when we were flying a lot that non-Americans who traveled dressed nicely and were much more polite than the so-called Ugly American. I'm afraid many of the citizens of this country fit the description. And another observation is that those from other countries who flew not only dressed nicely, but in general were slim and fit, even the older ones. Americans were much fatter and sloppily dressed. However, another observation I made as we traveled the world was that Japanese tourists could be as rude and pushy as the rude Americans. Not the business types in their suits, but the tourists. I'm afraid I developed sharp elbows when it came time to protect myself and our girls from any pushy, rude passengers from any country. And now, I'm just glad I rarely have to fly anywhere!

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May 18, 2024
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Linda Moon's avatar

Me too Ed....fixin' to go sit on my front porch in my rocking chair when I finish this reply.....

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Cheryl Chastain's avatar

Add a fresh bottle of bubbles, I like to sit in my rocker and blow bubbles.

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Trent's avatar

Fact is that in our human nature we seem to take the great trips for granted and focus on the few bad of well, anything. Flying for a living I’ve got my share of comedic and scary war stories - but I tip my cap to all those air travel pros from the desks to the phones to the planes to the luggage crews to the clean up and food folks. They are seldom thanked and appreciated and by golly I had a whole bunch more great and uneventful flights than not.

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Brandi Phillips's avatar

Gosh, I wish you’d have told Bill y’all had indeed landed and good luck finding his luggage at baggage claim!

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Joy Eastridge's avatar

LOL (which stands for either "laugh out loud" or "lots of love" depending on whether you are "Up" on lingo or a mom just trying to figure it all out. Maybe you could write a column on that. But I digress...). "Not going steady" and the smell description and the snoring. Goodness. No big deal, but you are too funny! Actually, it is kind of a big deal. I love getting a laugh first thing in the morning. LOL!!

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Bruce Hartnett's avatar

Jan, am disappointed that you Deleted your comment about your husband's and granddaughter's breathing problems (usually Mouth Breathers, as I've learned). I've a brother & his significant other (she the worst) who now use a CPAP to aid their breathing. Due to error in diagnosis, a few years ago, even I was temporarily on one. It didn't help, and caused a lack of Sleep for me. Turned out, as just one of the Effects of the West Nile Nueroinvasive Disease, that I just have Narcolepsy, which is totally different. Praying for your family!

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Jan(et) Lord's avatar

Thank you for understanding my thoughts. Not everyone was so considerate so I felt it best to delete it just in case it was offensive to some.

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Sharon Thomason's avatar

This sure gave me a much-needed laugh!

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